Do you ever find yourself turning small issues into big issues? Or maybe just feeling overwhelmed with trying to make everyone happy even if that means sacrificing your happiness? It is normal to feel overwhelmed; we all feel these personal stressors at one stage or another throughout life.
It can take some people many years, even into their late 50’s, before they know themselves enough to be happy within or come across these simple hacks to simplify their lives. But not you, uh ah, because you have decided to start your journey of self-improvement today.
You are here to improve yourself and create a simple, intentional and happy life. A life no longer ruled by pleasing everyone; wasting your valuable time attending events you do not want to; draining your energy trying to live up to an unrealistic level of perfection created by society, or spending time with people who do not add to your happiness.
It is time you put YOU first.
Here are 15 mindset shifts to get you started on your self-improvement journey to creating a simple life.
Listen within and not to everyone else
Not caring what others think and want for you is one of the greatest freedoms you can bestow on yourself. Follow your heart, take risks, do not just accept the safe and easy choice just because you are scared of what others might think or that you might fail. You probably will! So what? Get back up and try again, only this time you will do it better.
Do not let small minds convince you that your big dreams are too big. They are not.
Sometimes you have to take a deep breathe and remind yourself of who you are and what you want to achieve in this life.
Less than perfect is good enough
Stop trying to to do things perfectly. You only drain your energy and your self-esteem as you can not possibly live up to this impossible standard of perfectionism. What is perfection to you will be different from another. Sometimes good for now is better than perfect later. Perfect later never comes, so you end up with an unfished project. Get it done; good is enough.
You need to start accepting that life is not perfect, that people are not perfect, and that you are not perfect. Accepting that perfection is merely a marketing tool and not an accurate way to measure one’s happiness, you realise that real-life does not reward perfectionism. Real-life rewards those who do good, be good and are good.
Make peace with yourself
As the good old saying goes ‘love thyself before loving others’. You need to learn to love yourself and make peace with yourself. Accept who you are and what you have. Do not waste your time trying or wishing to be someone different. It’ll never happen.
You can improve your traits, but you can not magically be someone else. Use your energy improving your own life, not wasting it on being envious of what others have. You will find life will become much easier and simpler.
Spend time with people who bring you joy
Spend less time with the people who drag you down and more time with the people who make you happy. These are the people who love and appreciate you. The people who encourage you to improve in healthy and exciting ways. Who makes you feel alive and embrace you for who you are and what you want to become.
You will come across people who do not share your values or goals, and that is ok. It is when they start to tell you that your goals are just fantasy and unachievable, that you have to decide if they are the right people you should be spending your time on.
Ask instead of guessing or assuming
Unless you are a mind reader, you need to ask questions and communicate with those around you. Asking instead of guessing will minimise unnecessary conflicts, misunderstandings, and wasting time and energy.
You will find clarity, get the important things done and reduce stress.
“Assumptions are a movie playing in our head using a dialogue which has been made up. It exists from the area in our brain that utters the words; maybe, perhaps, suppose, suspect.” The Startup
Check out The Startup’s post ‘The Power of Asking Versus Assuming’
Do not sweat the small stuff
There is a saying ‘make a mountain out of a molehill’ that means you should not let a minor issue seem like it is a significant issue. Save your energy and pick your battles.
Next time you feel stressed about something ask yourself “am I making a mountain out of a molehill”?
Stop trying to please everyone
There will no doubt be people you meet that you do not get along with, have chemistry with or that do not like you. Everyone has their own story and experience, so often it can be about them and will be something you have no control over.
Learn to let go of what was not meant to be
To enjoy the life that is waiting for you, you need to learn to let go of the life you planned. Letting go is an essential part of moving on to something better. If you are still attached to things you should let go of, then you will not get what you truly deserve.
Life is all about the lessons we learn. Sometimes you struggle, then you learn, then you move on to something bigger and better.
Embrace being a work in progress
Being a work in progress does not mean you are not good enough today; All it means is you want to be a better person tomorrow. To be able to love yourself completely so that you can live a purposeful and intentional life.
Once you accept that you will always be a work in progress, you are free to focus on improving yourself. Instead of wasting all your time beating yourself up about not being perfect.
Remember, life is about the journey, not the destination.
Stop worrying and complaining
Life is usually as good or as bad as you think it is. So, why not focus on the things you can control, for example, your diet and fitness, and do something about it?
Some say that ‘those who complain get the least done.’
Look for the silver lining
When times get tough, we should focus on the things we have over the things we do not. As things get hard, we feel down, and that is ok. Take a deep breath and look for that silver lining. Remind yourself that it is through the tough times that we grow strong and more resilient. Sometimes, even more, humbled.
Take action!
Do you ever find yourself asking questions not to seek an answer but to affirm what your soul already knows? Well, you are not doing yourself any favours by merely hearing the same response from people over and over again.
Accept that you already know the answer: you are just scared you will fail and look silly! Again, this is ok, but at some stage, you will have to make the conscious decision to take action.
Why not make that today?
Protect your time and energy
If it does not add value or joy to your life, stop wasting time on it.
As life changes so do you.
Stop saying yes to things you really do not want to do, when you would rather spend your time on something else.
Do not let one-sided relationships and friendships take up your valuable time and energy.
What you once enjoyed you may not now. You may have loved your job 5 years ago, but now you lack passion for it.
If you do not like doing something anymore, stop doing it.
Sometimes it isn’t that simple (like quitting your job straight off the bat) but it sure as hell is possible. Create an action plan for finding a new job or pursuing a new career.
Identify your stressors
Is there one or multiple things causing you a lot of stress or overwhelm? Maybe a one-sided friendship? Not having enough time for yourself? You have low self-esteem due to health issues (you have gained a few extra kilos and can not fit in those tight jeans anymore, we have all been there!). Maybe your job is going nowhere fast or not flexible with your family life?
Choose one right now and create an action plan! Right now! Grab a pen and a notebook or open your notes app on your phone and start writing down what is causing you stress and how you can overcome it.
Choose acts of kindness daily
It shows real character when you can overlook someone’s flaws and appreciate them for who they are. Accepting that they are on their journey to self-enlightenment and will be at a different level than you.
So, instead of small acts of judgement and criticism towards the people around you and yourself, choose acts of kindness to build confidence and overall happiness within.
Ready to improve your mindset for a simple life?
Hopefully, you have come across a few mindset hacks that you can adopt or at the very least start working on today. Choose one that you feel might be most beneficial to you and get to it.
Self-development is not a sprint; it is a marathon.
Please comment if you found this post helpful or if you know someone who may need this post, please share.
Until next post, have an insightful day x
